Warning. This post is taking a divergent pass. It isn’t going with the natural flow that I’ve been sharing lately. This post has been stuck in my craw for a while now, and the pit of my stomach has ached as I’ve been wrestling with this. It’s about TRUST.
Trust noun
firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something
- “relations have to be built on trust”
- Similar: confidence, belief, faith
Trust. It’s a word that’s been going around our house a lot these days. Do we trust our government? Am I a friend you can trust? What does it feel like to have someone break trust? How do we raise our children to be honorable and trustworthy? All are viable questions, ones that deserve contemplation and continual reflection.
This isn’t a political post so I won’t go into everything that’s been happening in our world in regards to trusting those with authority over us. Power is a great responsibility that requires great trust. What you believe to be true and trustworthy in regards to our government is for you to decide.
Losing faith or trust in an institution or business is tough though, especially when it’s one that you may have been completely involved with and enjoyed. It’s difficult when systems break trust, when they don’t stay in their lane and step out of their scope. They no longer offer the trust on which you built your relationship. You no longer can pass that same trust along to others seeking what they sell or represent. As I struggle with this, I ask myself: Do I trust them enough to recommend them? Are they worthy of my respect and referral? Do I trust them to love and cherish those that I’ve referred? The answers to these critical questions can dispel any ambiguity. The answers build my basis of trust or distrust.
I believe with all my heart that actions speak louder than words. I live each day as an act of love and worship to my Savior Jesus Christ. I have placed my trust for salvation in Him. He has trusted me to live a life worthy of Him. I hold honesty, loyalty, and trust in the highest regard. If I am not a friend you can trust, I have failed.
So, what do we do when our faith and trust have been broken? We restore. We go back and decide what’s important. We separate the battles from the wars; we decide which hills we’re willing to die on. Then we ask ourselves, is it better to be bitter or rebuilt?
Reconciliation of relationships is extremely important to me. If both parties are willing to redeem the friendship, it is possible to rebuild trust. It requires humility and honesty; two gifts that if applied lavishly by both parties reap rewards. As not to be utopic, I confess some of my relationships have NOT been restored. The ones that have healed have taken much prayer and patience. Yet, there’s still time for complete redemption and my heart is always waiting for the opportunity to reconcile.
When trust is broken it feels like immense betrayal. It’s difficult for my heart to winnow through the breach of trust and separate from the pain of brokenness. I’m an all-in type of person. When I love, I love deeply. When I hurt, it cuts completely through. I guess I’m a bit of a romanticist and truly believe we should all be able to get along and love each other. There’s absolutely no room in my life for trauma intentionally inflicted.
As I discipline my children to be honorable, I teach them about the fragility of trust, I’m reminded of the analogy of the egg. Take an egg, a raw egg. Cradle it in your hand. This is trust. It’s a gift given to you for safe keeping. It’s vulnerable and needs protection. Treasure your trust. Be careful with it!
Now break the egg. Smash it. Let the dogs lick it up off the floor. What has become of the egg? This is what happens when trust is broken. Try to put it back together. It’s very difficult to rebuild trust after it’s broken, isn’t it? It takes a lot of work to hold trust carefully, yet it takes a moment to shatter it.
Broken trust CAN be rebuilt, but it takes time. It takes effort. It takes a lot of patience and love to rebuild what was broken. There are two paths before every fork in the road. The straight and narrow path leads to honor. The crooked path is full of deceit. The good news is that restoration is within reach. Trust CAN be rebuilt.
The way we choose to live is our story to the world. We share a lot about ourselves by the words we choose, the actions we take, the motives we ponder. Our story is a culmination of the trusts we’ve built.
